Health:
-Don't take a vitamin without washing it down with water. Otherwise it gets stuck in your chest and becomes a pain in the rear for the rest of the day.
-I'm fairly convinced that glass tables are a clear sign that some people just want to watch the world burn. Those invisible leg-wounders are everywhere. Steer clear.
-If your P.E teacher tries to get you to overextend yourself, just go along with it. Disagreeing with his regimen generally makes him dislike you more.
-Don't just tell the nurse you have a headache. That's basically just the code word for "Just don't want to do the math problem that hurts my brain."
Gaming Stuff:
-Wearing cloth armor during a LARP session, while allowing you to take more hits, actually makes it harder to move around quickly. Hone your skills so that you have no need for it in the first place- take them out before they can get close enough to take advantage of your lack of armor.
-Always focus the AD Carry in a game of League Of Legends, unless the enemy team has a Sona. If they do, kill her as fast as you can.
-If you aren't as skilled as the person insulting you, you're a noob. If you're more skilled, then you have no life. Just insult logic.
-Upon winning as Mr. Satan (Hercule) in any Dragonball Z game, do not yell "Hail Satan!" as a victory quote. People tend to take that the wrong way.
-You can not, and will not, defeat Binky from AQworlds by yourself. Trust me on this one. Put your pride away and work with a team.
School:
-Math sucks. No joke here, it just feels really good to say that.
-Only fall asleep in class if you know the subject, are clearly going to pass or if you recently pulled an all-nighter studying for that same class. Then the teacher owes you one.
-Giving the teacher presents is not bribery. Do not call the teacher's pet a brown-noser.
-Only take the handicap elevator is A) You are handicaped, B) You are carrying something large that you can't climb stairs with, C) You are helping someone handicapped, or D) Nobody is looking.
-In the case that you are alone in the elevator after boarding by method D, it is okay to break out into a fit of "Elevator Dancing". Discoing is hardly the worst thing you can do in an elevator.
Frog Milestones Of 2014:
-January- Had the finest meal of my life aboard a cruise ship: Fillet Mignon seasoned to perfection with volcanic ash salt. You know how in Ratatouille when the meal causes the food critic to have a flashback and he goes into an ecstasy-inspired shock? It tasted kind of like that.
-February- Seeing couples on Valentine's Day makes me sad to be alone, but also happy that I can keep living the single life. Bachelorhood feels awesome.
-March- Went a entire St. Patricks Day without being pinched. Not much, but still a milestone for me. There's always that one guy who just wants to be rude.
-April- Payed tribute to the great Ebert. Hope you're doing good up there, Roger. Did Gene Siskel save you an aisle seat?
-May- End of school year. Resisted urge to flip off gym teacher instead of wishing him heartfelt farewell.
-June- CIT job at LARP camp. Trained and led kids in activities- many foam weapons to the crotch ensue.
-July/August- Mountain Adventure- Almost died stranded on a mountain with no food and little water. Managed to go get help but then ended up puking up blood and getting an IV. Fun times all around. Gained new outlook and another chance on life and vowed to make it count. Surprisingly, not my first brush with death- he and I play cards every Friday. For the record: Death cheats.
Also voted head of diplomacy and thievery groups in overnight LARP experience after talking down enormous group of bandits and rolling the poker table. No word yet if diplomacy and being a bandit are in any way connected. Also developed love of spears after a very manly weapon yank.
Gencon 2014- Gencon. Enough said.
-September- Back to school. Nothing else really happens in September, does it?
-October- First year of no Trick-or-Treating. Made up for no free candy by raiding the candy for the kids at the Halloween party I was at. I feel personally responsible for 50% of the bowl missing at the end of the night.....
-November- Had a birthday, got presents, went to Dad's family for Hannukah, got more presents, took my dog for a walk and he left me presents.
-December- (Insert Christmas freakout here)
School:
-Math sucks. No joke here, it just feels really good to say that.
-Only fall asleep in class if you know the subject, are clearly going to pass or if you recently pulled an all-nighter studying for that same class. Then the teacher owes you one.
-Giving the teacher presents is not bribery. Do not call the teacher's pet a brown-noser.
-Only take the handicap elevator is A) You are handicaped, B) You are carrying something large that you can't climb stairs with, C) You are helping someone handicapped, or D) Nobody is looking.
-In the case that you are alone in the elevator after boarding by method D, it is okay to break out into a fit of "Elevator Dancing". Discoing is hardly the worst thing you can do in an elevator.
Frog Milestones Of 2014:
-January- Had the finest meal of my life aboard a cruise ship: Fillet Mignon seasoned to perfection with volcanic ash salt. You know how in Ratatouille when the meal causes the food critic to have a flashback and he goes into an ecstasy-inspired shock? It tasted kind of like that.
-February- Seeing couples on Valentine's Day makes me sad to be alone, but also happy that I can keep living the single life. Bachelorhood feels awesome.
-March- Went a entire St. Patricks Day without being pinched. Not much, but still a milestone for me. There's always that one guy who just wants to be rude.
-April- Payed tribute to the great Ebert. Hope you're doing good up there, Roger. Did Gene Siskel save you an aisle seat?
-May- End of school year. Resisted urge to flip off gym teacher instead of wishing him heartfelt farewell.
-June- CIT job at LARP camp. Trained and led kids in activities- many foam weapons to the crotch ensue.
-July/August- Mountain Adventure- Almost died stranded on a mountain with no food and little water. Managed to go get help but then ended up puking up blood and getting an IV. Fun times all around. Gained new outlook and another chance on life and vowed to make it count. Surprisingly, not my first brush with death- he and I play cards every Friday. For the record: Death cheats.
Also voted head of diplomacy and thievery groups in overnight LARP experience after talking down enormous group of bandits and rolling the poker table. No word yet if diplomacy and being a bandit are in any way connected. Also developed love of spears after a very manly weapon yank.
Gencon 2014- Gencon. Enough said.
-September- Back to school. Nothing else really happens in September, does it?
-October- First year of no Trick-or-Treating. Made up for no free candy by raiding the candy for the kids at the Halloween party I was at. I feel personally responsible for 50% of the bowl missing at the end of the night.....
-November- Had a birthday, got presents, went to Dad's family for Hannukah, got more presents, took my dog for a walk and he left me presents.
-December- (Insert Christmas freakout here)
